–Breathe, Skin Deep*

Today’s the day I’ll finally say, I’m doing way more than great.

I’m pretty some days, other days I’m sexier, the waist looks thinner.  I’m a thick woman, still so fine. I’m happy to be mine. I adore a reflection everytime I pass by; and for so long, I’ve been waiting for that prime time. For years I lost me, back when you became mine. They watched my essence start fading everytime you came by. But after years of being held down, I broke free and took back my crown. We been apart for some time; you always thought I was yours, but I knew that you weren’t mine. Now that time has come, my time is titled divine; ‘Best believe Mama B’s gonna shine.

It took a bit of faith, it took a shit load of struggle; you can say I hustled through the bullshit and found my way. I prayed with every step, thank God today’s not just another day. For months I’ve been riding on a cloud, feeling so proud. I finally found my way; tomorrow’s looking more than great. All those hazy days cleared their greys, now I’m straight, it’s time to buckle down and be all I gotta be to pave the way.

I got three strong beauties just looking at me, waiting for the next step so they can hop on my beat; they wait for Mama’s go just to move their feet. And I’m proud to be, so proud to be the one that their following, I’m proud to be leading the way.

I guess when you met me, you thought I was just another chick around the way, thought I wouldn’t have too much to say. Three months in, you said, “Just sit back and look pretty.” So offended, I wanted to bust your face, but instead I just sat back with grace, and stayed content with my feelings. But my heart speaks way more than I led on, a soft voice but I speak strong; don’t get it wrong, she’s a woman that’s unique, tricky and convincing like her physique. A beauty much more than skin deep, a soul that captures and sucks in  whatever you speak, but you spoke some dirty thangs to me. Now I gotta filter all the debris, shake off all the dusty things.

What watch you say to me, reflections reply when you seek whats inside of me, and I won’t lie when speaking of what you left with me. Bad memories, too much drama, too much violence, you were crazy. And I’m supposed to sugar-coat the shady things? Nah, I’ma speak on everything. I’d probably let it fly, if it were just me, but you affected my babies, my fancy jewels, my shiny things. And this is the time when a mother speaks, so sit back and just let it bleed. ‘Cause it’s the truth and its physical. You f*cked up and finally I’ve been let go, so don’t be shocked when this fire-cracker blows. It’s a go.

I’m so free, I’m doing me; I’m speaking truths, confessing everything. Let a woman speak when its her time to breathe. Every lady needs her chance to be, ladies breathe, just take a moment and breathe for you and breathe for me. Breathe for every woman that took on pressure that tattooed her soul skin deep. Breathe for suckas that lost the good ones, breathe for them bad chicks with the big guns; pushing that weight to just become an undefeated champion. Breathe for the girls that just begun, the ones that ain’t found their way, say a prayer that they follow the wisdom that God lays. Pray that they see the steps that we missed, the ones we didn’t take. Pray that we all keep up with the scripture so that the devil can’t hit ya. Pray for the women that are going through too much, pray that a miracle touches every family that lost their way. Pray that the unfair circumstances pave a way, and every family find a rainbow shining bright upon their day. Pray that they find a solution in tomorrow’s promises, pray that they find happiness in another day.

I’m gonna pray, that every woman breathes, the way I breathed today. I want them to feel the oxygen of a woman’s freedom day. As long as you’re here, you still have a chance to make a change. So ladies, let’s breathe and feel freedom today.

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